I think everyone has noticed the new name of the blog; I felt a change was in order as I start a new chapter in my life. In trying to come up with something I came across Nattergalen, and I'm using it in what I'll call it a slight nod to Florence, but mainly a reference to Hans Christian Andersen's story.
For the full translation of the tale, you can click here. But this is the truncated version:
There was a Chinese emperor who had built himself the most beautiful palace in the world with a beautiful garden, all built at a great cost. And visitors who came to the palace would all compliment the emperor on his beautiful home. Except they would all tell him that the most beautiful thing of all about it was the nightingale that would sing there.
So the emperor had the nightingale come sing in his court, and all were in awe of her beautiful song. Until the emperor was sent an artificial nightingale to sing to him. The fake bird sang just as beautifully, but could only sing one kind of song. However, it was also beautiful to look at, being encrusted with jewels. The real nightingale left the court and the emperor banished her.
So the fake bird sang for the court until one day it broke. And as the years passed the emperor became ill. But when Death came for the emperor as he was wasting away, the real nightingale returned, turning Death away with her song and healing the emperor.
So do you see why this is a fitting story? Me, like the nightingale, being cast aside because others have valued looks and outer beauty over what is beautiful about me from within. And that inner beauty being able to heal and bring someone to tears.
If you're thinking I'm full of shit right now, you would be right. It is a crock, and it is not why I'm renaming my blog after this story.
I haven't been like the nightingale; I've been the emperor.
Too many times I have valued looks over what's inside, or cared about what others would think over what I should have felt was important. Or tried to live in places considered "cool" -- like Florida and California -- over places I could make a real home for myself. I have to admit that when I made to shift to nursing the fact that I could move around was pretty appealling.
I said before that what attracted me to journalism was what I could contribute to my community; to provide a civic service. But I had lost that -- my career had become about what I wanted, and I was bitter because I felt (somewhat erroneously) it could not provide these things: a nice big house, nice car and a life outside of work. Really I just blamed the job on me not being able to save money nor have the self-confidence to go out and socialize or, God help me, actually date anyone.
So I decided on nursing because I needed something else for myself. And sure, the chance at more money and advancement were factors, but I needed something that wasn't going to just be about me. I want to be able to help others who really need someone.
I've been the emperor, but I'd really like to be the nightingale.
8 comments:
Good, so I was right about both Anderson and about Florence too. You are going to enjoy your new career, I bet. The nurses I have known are all cool in a nice grounded way.
I like how most of the moral fairy tales involve an emperor of some sort.
I read a short bio of Florence Nightingale. She's not all that, some think. Hehe.
As you pointed out elsewhere, most song birds of the night are male, not female as in that fable. So it's fitting that you're a male nurse (who will have to work nights so we can continue our nocturnal phone conversations!)
You should memorize a stanza of Keats' "Ode to a Nightingale," so you can charm and comfort (or annoy) your patients:
Thou wast not born for death, immortal Bird!
No hungry generations tread thee down;
The voice I hear this passing night was heard
In ancient days by emperor and clown:
Perhaps the self-same song that found a path
Through the sad heart of Ruth, when, sick for home,
She stood in tears amid the alien corn;
The same that ofttimes hath
Charm'd magic casements, opening on the foam
Of perilous seas, in faery lands forlorn.
Thanks, DW. Yeah, you were right. I think I will enjoy it, too.
I'll remember the stanza, kc. And yes, you can be I'll work nights, not just to keep up our night calls, but also because part of the stress I'm under now is the rearranging of my sleep schedule to get up by 6:30. I'm being reminded that I am not a morning person.
You'll be a fantastic nightingale, George. You've got scads of inner beauty.
As far as "actually dating anyone," I suppose you're familiar with Florence Nightingale syndrome? Surely you can parlay that into some dates.
Good luck with the start of school.
What sort of classes do you start with?
Speaking of classes, I'm enrolled in 11 of them this fall. I just spent $560 on books.
Ahhhh, back to school again.
Thanks, Erin. And Florence Nightingale syndrome had not occurred to me. Very interesting. I like the way you think.
DW, it'll start with nursing skills stuff and anatomy and physiology in the first quarter, and then specialized fields are added later: medical, surgery, oncology, etc ...
Eleven classes, Ben? Whoa! Tell me there are a bunch of one-hour credits in there and you're not taking 33 hours.
Two 3-hour courses, five 2-hour courses, and four 1-hour courses. So I'm only taking 20 hours.
I'm taking a bunch of related courses that would be combined into three-hour courses at any sane school.
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